All Clear

Today & yesterday were busy with doctors appointments & labs. I'm so used to going to Vanderbilt for chemo & being there for hours it's a weird feeling to just go to see a doctor. Yesterday was my final visit with Dr Johnson, the radiation oncologist. Yep, I have my first official release from an oncologist. I hope it's a sign of things to come! I dont have anymore appointments in the basement, where radiation oncology hides. Hooray. Today I had labs, then I saw Dr Keedy. She is so wonderful. She said it was quite the accomplishment to undergo a major surgery being so nutropenic (low white blood cells) & anemic (low red blood cells). We thoroughly reviewed everything & agreed to start chemo again with the 5 day Ifosfamide Etopocide regimen Monday followed by Cyclophosphamide Adriamycin & vincristine the week of july 9. She is pleased its only a 2 week break & was thrilled with how quickly my white count has stabilized as well as how well the anemia has resolved. The pain I still have from surgery is to be expected. I guess my expectations of being pain free within a week weren't quite realistic. I also had my follow up with general surgery today. It was a very brief visit with a sweet Dr Bailey who reminded me a lot of Dr Bailey on Greys Anatomy (but my Dr Bailey was tall). My incisions look good - the steri-strips are still on them. She told me about a doctor friend of hers who recently had a laparoscopic appendectomy. She said it was a little over 3 weeks before all her pain was gone. She said her friend said she wouldnt ever tell her patients the recovery was a breeze again. Made me feel better! The surgeon also said its fine to start back on chemo Monday. I have really mixed emotions tonight. I'm thrilled that the blood counts are back to normal & the surgery healing is going well. I know intellectually I can't finish chemo if don't start back. But I dread Monday morning. I dread the smells of chemo, the hours in that chair, the foggy feeling from the meds, missing a trade show in San Francisco, having my port accessed for 5 days. Ugh. On the other hand, next week puts me well over halfway, I have plenty of work to do from there, I adore my nurses, I won't have to get blood, and I am anxious to get to the end. So I'm pretty conflicted at this point.... Maybe the next 5 days will crawl by! And the 5 after that will fly! Thanks one more time for the cards, calls, emails, messages. I need you to keep them up, don't let up now please.